A plague-like virus is becoming increasingly prevalent in children and young adults aged between 6 – 21 years +. The symptoms usually exhibit themselves firstly in the home but also at school. Doctors and researchers were at a loss to understand the virus to begin with but now have a far better understanding of its causes and symptoms, although treatment options are still being developed
The medical terminology for the disease is I.C.S. – Indulged Child Syndrome although its common term is “Adidam” – All Day I Dream About Myself. Early research has shown strong linkages of I.C.S. with the corresponding growth in both parent working homes, mass advertising by multi national labels, ownership of text enabled cell phones and hormone feeding of chickens leading to early puberty. The disease seems to strike girls first at a considerably younger age than for boys. Although there have been recorded cases of girls as young as 4 years old, it is more common to strike at around the 9 – 11 year old stage. Interestingly, for boys it doesn’t usually inflict them until late teens.

The effect on families of this disease is, understandably, quite devastating. Formerly placid, polite, obedient nice young children transform into the child from hell. The usual treatment method by parents is a financial one – buy them whatever they want or better still, give them the money to go out and buy it themselves. Bed times and curfews are suspended because of course, no other child has these. A common remedy is to let them stay on the phone as long as they like, usually in the bedroom with the door closed. Staying at all night parties where both boys and girls are both sleeping over is another good remedy. Under no circumstances should parents attempt to curtail the freedom of the child to do as they like because this will further aggravate the condition by causing stress. Stress will mean the child can not go to school and may even have to give up school altogether.

Naturally, the stress of having a child with this condition impacts quite heavily on parents. Some parent’s marriages are strained by the condition as mother and father start to have different ideas on how to treat the problem. In some severe cases, parents actually divorce because of this disease. Anecdotal evidence suggests it is usually the father who breaks first.

Amongst the more perplexing symptoms is the problem of the role confusion and identity crisis. In its fully developed form, the virus leads children to hallucinate about their identity and role in the family. Many actually believe that they are the parents, and the parents, the children. This being the case, they make up all their own rules for their life and have their parents, wait on them, hand and foot. This particular stage of the disease can be fatal but if not, certainly has dire consequences. This disease gets worse when children are treated as adults with adult rights, equalities and freedoms.

  • As with any disease, prevention is better than cure and early identification and treatment can help stop the virus and its effects, from becoming more serious. Some of the early symptoms include:
  • Long, secret phone calls behind closed doors.
  • The need to have Nike, Roxy, Quicksilver, Rusty and other similar brand named clothes (but not Bodyglove as it comes from the Warehouse!)
  • Frequent reference to the fact that all other children have them / will be going / are allowed.
  • Pressure to increase bedtimes / curfew.
  • Answering back.
  • Refusal to take no for an answer.
  • Absolute refusal to credit parents with having any sense, experience or use (except to provide money and food).
  • The rules of the house, road or school do not apply to them.
  • Inability to study without the phone, T.V, and MSN all being simultaneously available.
  • Unable to set table, or clear dishes from the table.
  • Inability to clean dishes, put washing in washing machine or tidy bedroom.
  • Lovely (sickly) smile and nice tone when they want something.

Treatment options only really work if applied at the early stages of manifestation of the symptoms. Once the disease is established, known remedies are not very effective. Parents need to seek or apply rigorous treatment at the first signs of this virus. Remedies include:

  • Establishing reasonable rules and responsibilities.
  • Sticking to these rules.
  • Being proactive rather than reactive.
  • Both parents having the same rules and standards.
  • Both parents back up each other, not the child.
  • Parents setting deadlines and curfews.
  • Pocket money provided at $1.00 per year of age, in return for jobs completed around the house.
  • Clothes provided at age appropriate monetary values.
  • Applying the concept of working towards a goal or saving up for a consumer item (sometimes with parent subsidy).
  • Parents being parents and children being children.
  • Ring other parents to check on permission, home times etc.
  • Rewards provided for consistently good behaviour not for brief cessation of poor behaviour.

Indulged child syndrome poses serious risks to our future society and family structures as we currently know it. It needs to be identified, confronted and treated. The first step is to make a start. Extreme situations call for extreme remedies and sometimes “Cold Turkey” or “Tough Love” prescriptions will be required. To avoid “Indulged Child Syndrome” children need to be treated as children. Rationalization is an adult concept and does not work with children. They do not have cognitive development or maturity to understand. They need consistently applied boundaries, simple rules and explanations, duties and expectations and meaningful consequences when they disregard the rules and expectations.